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Humor Column

Our humor columnist reviews her favorite time of the year: Halloweekend

Emma Lee | Contributing Illustrator

Our humor columnist enjoyed seeing everyone’s Halloween costumes this year, from an inflatable T-Rex, to a sexy version of Vector from Despicable Me. She was a little surprised to see the T-Rex at the gym, but, of course, dinosaurs need exercise too.

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It’s been a spooky week, not just because of the election, but also because this past weekend marked Halloween here at Syracuse, or as some call it, Halloweekend.

If I had to pick a favorite time of year at school, it would most definitely be Halloweekend. I mean, where else are you going to see a girl dressed as sexy Vector from “Despicable Me,” complete with a bowl cut, glasses and an orange bodysuit with butt cheek cutouts. I also heard rumblings of a man wearing an inflatable dinosaur costume while running on the treadmill at the Barnes Center at The Arch.

Extinct species need exercise, too, apparently. However, the image of a T-Rex trying to weight lift with tiny little arms does make me kick my feet and giggle.

With Halloween on Thursday this year, we had two weekends of celebrating in a row. Naturally, I invested far too much in a Mrs. Incredible costume from Party City and hit the streets. I’m sure you’re asking: “Sarah? Why the Mrs. Incredible costume?” Well, dear reader, this past weekend, I was very strongly manifesting a future as a hot mom with a great butt. I must say, it looks very promising.



One thing about me is that I don’t go out much. It’s not that I don’t have friends or dislike having fun (why? Does it seem like I have no friends and hate fun?). But more than ever since turning 20, I’m not as spritely as I used to be at 18. My back hurts. My stomach hurts. My hair looks weird. I’m tired. I don’t like to wear crop tops anymore, and I’m pretty sure crop tops are the dress code for Halloweekend.

So … let’s just say I was dusting off my old party boots. I squeezed myself into my Incredibles suit (no capes, of course), drank a glass of water to prevent muscle cramps after walking marathon-level distances to the next house party and snapped on my mask. If Mrs. Incredible had a catchphrase, I would shout it from the rooftops.

What would Mrs. Incredible’s catchphrase be, by the way? “Let’s get stretchy?” This is a thinker that even an Academy Award-winning screenwriter couldn’t crack.

If you’re like me, then the pregame is the most exhilarating part of the night. At this point, everyone is still excited to go out and dance or maybe even meet someone. It’s very different from the end of the night when everyone is upset for some reason or another. Maybe someone stepped on their foot. Maybe they saw their Tinder hookup with his girlfriend. Maybe someone spilled a beer on their Spiderman costume. It’s always something.

Anyway, the pregame was quite frightening, I have to say. Outside of the house, the owners had one of those Spirit Halloween decorations. You know, the ones that jump at you? I had to spend the pregame outside because I was too scared to pass the clown that made the “BWAHeheheheheh!” noise. I’ve seen “It.” I’m not taking any chances.

After an hour, we went to the party. In the least “Señorita Awesome” way possible (A very online reference that I apologize for), I always want to bring a book with me to the party, just in case I get bored. When most parties run out of chips, that’s when I end up wanting to leave. A good book adds about an extra 30 minutes to my battery life. Unfortunately, my friends did not let me and Sally Rooney was left at home. So, you can’t blame me for wanting to leave in the first 10 minutes.

Overall, the weekend was a lot of fun (or, at least it was when I snuck out and ate McDonald’s on my roof in my sweat-stained Incredibles suit). Even though the spookiness has continued after these election results, I can’t wait to start planning for next Halloweekend at Syracuse.

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