Mailing it in
Flo Rida
‘Mail on Sunday’
40 Decibels
Genre: Rap
Sounds like: The mediocre rapper from the ‘Low’ song
Flo Rida doesn’t take the time to introduce himself on the opening track of his debut album, ‘Mail on Sunday.’ Instead, there’s a glitter rush of synthesizers before Flo, famous for the hit ‘Low’ with T-Pain, jumps right into ‘American Superstar’ with Lil Wayne riding shotgun.
It’s an untraditional move, eschewing the chance to say hello before starting the album. But it’s probably a good idea. Let’s face it: You couldn’t care less who Flo Rida is. But maybe that’s the point – a bland MC who kills time rapping while crowds wait for the chorus.
His name is stupid (yes, he’s from Florida), but that’s forgivable. OutKast isn’t the most original moniker either, but ‘Stankonia’ still rules.
The better question is, why even release an album? Is anyone really clamoring for 45 minutes alone with the Rida?
This is hip hop in a can. To say Flo Rida comes off an assembly line is an insult to the fine work done at meat packaging plants across the country.
But such is the bizarre state of hip hop in 2008, when a clown like Mims can debut in the Top Ten, while Talib Kweli slums for a paycheck as a ‘Made’ coach on MTV, teaching some New England fencing dweeb how to rap.
A guy like Flo is lucky enough to have T-Pain or Timbaland sing his hooks and pay his bills. Tim produced the second single, ‘Elevator.’ It’s great if you’re into unintentional comedy: four minutes of the vaunted producer using the vertical transport device as a metaphor for his erection (I think).
The highlight, of course, is ‘Low,’ a song that gets funnier and funnier upon repeated listens. It’s been a huge hit for everyone involved – T-Pain, Flo, even Nelly’s jean company (a definition high point, because it could only go up after that ‘Sweat/Suit’ disaster) – but not enough to hang an album on.
Cruising keyboards – the kind T.I. rides like the Santa Cruz surf – serve as most of the backing music, which is a plus. Everything else is a bit of a problem. Most of the songs on ‘Mail on Sunday’ are throwaways, except Will.i.am’s contribution ‘In The Ayer.’ That song should be buried somewhere, never to be heard of again.
An apologist might say Lil Wayne’s guest spot in the opener gives Flo some credibility, but that holds no quarter. Weezy will show up any place where there’s a mic and no smoke detector. The new best rapper alive does the usual: takes the hook – something about guns for the snitches and roses for the, well, you get the point – then blows away his host with away with Tom Petty references, then heads off into the sunset probably to spit about Tex Winter’s Triangle offense on a Rick Ross remix.
But that’s neither here nor there. As you can see, it’s easy to lose focus.
Published on March 17, 2008 at 12:00 pm
